To numb the mind, to pass the time in the arms of complacency. To feel the sting of winter's chill with the weight of regret bearing down on me. To see the marks and the lines of age, constant reminders of past mistakes. And the once distant future is steadily gaining and closing in on me. I can't seem to discern between pages and bridges I've burned. Bound by perpetual flaw, bound by loss, bound by pain. Tracing the lines of a shattered reflection left to scar, left to haunt. Facing the fears of an idle projection void of faith, void of love. Just like that familiar stretch of highway where the flare stack burns like a beacon, guiding my way into an unending haze. And in the array of blinding white light smokestacks pour out into the night sky, begging me to accept and to identify as nothing more than a cog in the machine. Surrender myself as it swallows me whole for it reeks of bittersweet finality. I can't seem to discern between comfort and love, self-loathing and worth. I can't seem to explain all the endless hours I waste shielding my eyes from the light, awaiting the darkness to fall. Tracing the lines of a shattered reflection, facing the fears of an idle projection. Gnashing of teeth, longing for sleep, unending cycle of anguish and pain. Passing of days, wallow in shame, condemning myself as my worst enemy.
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